19 Months DTE

Yesterday we hit another milestone.  We blew past 18 months DTE and pushed right up to 19 months DTE.  

These posts are hard to write.  On a day to day basis, we are making it through this wait okay.  I simply stay busy to avoid thinking about it.  However, I can't say I'm so at peace with this that I can make these blog posts sound joyful.

I broke down a while back over the "day to day".  I was discussing with some friends of mine how hard the wait has been.  The advice was to take it one day at a time.  Which is great advice and the only way we are getting through this.  However, I realized one day at a time has turned into 19 months!  Just focusing on getting through each day has not allowed me to have any future vision for a family that didn't end up including Brother up to this point.  I feel a bit sad about that and some part of me wishes we just would have known how long this wait was going to be from the get go. 

Our numbers still haven't changed...# 1 for over 18 months, #2 for between 12 and 18 months and tied for #4 or #5 for under 12 months.  We also still haven't received that coveted "on deck" email.  The email simply means our agency expects us to receive a referral in the next few months.  Plenty of families have recieved referrals without ever getting that email and plenty of families have gotten that email and then waited months and months for a referral.   So, really it is meaningless, but to me it says, "Hey, we know you are there and haven't forgotten about you."

My dear friend, who is moving {boo hoo} and has two little boys from Ethiopia gave me a very appropriate shirt yesterday...it says, "Anxiously awaiting my little boy from Ethiopia."  At 19 months DTE I'd say that sums it up nicely.